Do You Even Have Time To Date? - Part 1
This blog will be part of a 4-part series, so make sure to check in May 5th for part two!
Being a BOSS can be lonely at times; the long hours, tight schedule, the demands of life all manage to get in the way of those things that we would like to do but just can’t find the time to. That is what I would like show you in this 4-part series how to find the time, prepare your mind, heart and schedule, how to stop attracting the “clingy ones” and the value of working with a relationship coach to help you bring it all together. Let’s begin.
Do you even have TIME to date?
As a high-achieving, ambitious woman, your schedule is packed with activities. Meetings, bake sales, pick up and deliveries, conference calls, ZOOM lives, online events, household chores, aging parents, children, grandchildren, adult children still living at home, etc. As a woman with goals, you know exactly what this life feels like.
You have the desire for companionship but you do not have time for games, clingy men or to rearrange your entire schedule for yet another person one of your friends or family wants to “hook you up” with. Heck, you’re still trying to forget about the last dating fiasco you recently experienced so starting over…again…does not appeal to you at all.
Listen, I get it. I was exactly where you are now and then it hit me. The more time I spent focusing on others, the less time I had left for myself. Hanging out with the girls was fun, girl’s trips, shopping sprees, etc. those all worked to fill the time, but when I was alone, I craved a relationship of my very own.
The first problem I identified was that I honestly did NOT have the time. Where would I even fit a date into my schedule? So that’s where I started and that’s where I would like to invite you to start. Even if you are not actually in the market for a relationship, this is a great exercise to help you determine exactly WHERE all of your time is going and why you are so exhausted at the end of the day.
To help me identify where my time was going, I created the Relationship Energy Wheel™. The purpose of this energy wheel is to bring awareness to where you are giving the most of your spiritual energy. If you complete this wheel being 100% honest with yourself, you will have the answer to why you are…
Always tired
Feel overwhelmed
Undervalued
Unappreciated
Overstimulated
Etc.
As soon as you begin to fill in your energy wheel, you will become aware of how many things are energetically draining you. Being energetically drained and not having an understanding of how has ruined plenty of relationships and even careers. For those that are not used to focusing on themselves, this exercise will be most beneficial to you while at the same time may cause a bit of anxiety. Know that this is normal and do yourself a huge favor and “feel the fear and do it anyway.” Once you complete this exercise, you can begin to make healthier choices that will help you to not only “recall your spirit” but maybe, for the first time in a long time, begin to feel whole.
Instructions:
1. Begin by writing your name in the middle of the circle
2. Next draw one spoke per person, activity or organization that you give time to throughout your week – to include the things that you want to do but can’t find the time for. It’s best that you write family members individually if you give each of them your attention.
Examples include:
Mother
Father
Children
Church
Work
Pet
Social club
Friends
Additional relatives
Running
Etc.
The goal is to capture each and every area in which you are giving attention so that you can rate them.
After you have completed your wheel on the next page, you are to go back and rate each item in terms of how “important” you think they are or how much time they take. The size of the wheel is small as it is the center. In this center, you are to write your name and draw your lines/spokes of your wheel around it.
The rating system is as follows:
Things you must continue to do or people you must continue to give energy to
Things that you feel you can give less time to
Things that you can let go of…that are not serving you
Do the best you can. Evaluate according to what you have identified as being important to you having the quality of life and love that you want.
Consider the items you’ve identified in Your 3-Lists and make the decision today to begin to shift a few things around in order to honor the spirit that is you.
My suggestion is to pull out this template whenever you begin to feel overwhelmed. Notice where you are giving your energy and take the time to create a shift in your life.
It’s time for you…to honor YOU!
ON THIS DAY I CHOOSE ME FIRST AND IT’S OK!!!
DATE: ______________________________
Want to get in touch?
To learn more about click the link Anita Charlot!
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To download your copy of the energy wheel assignment click the link!
Need help with your energy wheel or have questions, go to her calendar to book time today.
